With the insurge of awesome bands coming to Singapore to play us their awesome sets, I was just thinking about who I’d personally love to see them bring. Such excitement of going to a show reminds me of the time that Album Leaf tickets were initially sold out, only to have them open up another show later in the night at 10pm just for starving fans like me who didn’t manage to get the precious Esplanade tickets on time. I remember finding out new tickets were available while at the FCP lab in school, getting a massive heart attack of excitement while I fell down the stairs running to my car to Jurong Point to get them. It was a slow but enraged walk from that bum pain onwards.

So with all the quality acts coming, I ask, WHERE IS THE TRASH!?

I know we all orgasm at the thought of Muse, 65daysofstatic, Kings of Convenience, Cat Power, Indie Beginners’ Ting Tings and Death Cab. But where is the high Q trash pls!?

This is the list of people that should come along to balance of the… nice stuff.

1) Britney Spears

Just because it’s been a long time coming hello. Plus, who doesn’t miss nipple tassles.

2) Peaches

To shock and perturb local men by asking them to impeach her bush while looking like a butter factory ape.

3) Roisin Murphy

A better (but lower-budget) version of lady gaga as CHARINE MISCELLANEOUS PIE would say. She makes songs about someone loving to stuff their face and needing to give their mouths a rest sound kinda sweet in a electronic, drunk kinda way.

4) Gossip

Okay, the trashiness of Gossip is questionable. But the awesomeness of Beth Ditto makes up for it. With all the close-minded, long-straight-black hair, silver-hoop earring, mini-dress loving, pasty chinese boys out there, someone needs to mindfuck them with Beth Ditto’s image.

5) Major Lazer

The first time I saw the Pon The Floor Video, all I could think was What the flying Fuck? But it turns out that Major Lazer are two pasty white boys! Even better. The shit bit got bigger.

Okay, I’m getting tired. There’s a lot more trash out there but I’m tired of resizing images. So I’ll leave you with this. When I asked Charine for her favourite trashy music, she passed me this link. Albeit saying it was her least favourite thing of all time but I’m going to give her credit for this find anyway.